1 Shelly’s grandma teaches her about ghosts how to carry them in her hair If you carry your ghosts in your hair you can cut them off when you don’t need them anymore Otherwise Otherwise ghosts cling to your skin dig their fingers in under your ribs and stay with you long long after you want them gone Shelly’s mother doesn’t like ghosts She doesn’t like Grandma telling Shelly about them It’s an old argument one they have every time Grandma gives Shelly a lesson You’ll scare her she says like Shelly isn’t in the room You’ll keep her up at night How is she going to take care of herself if she can’t take care of the dead Grandma asks and Shelly’s mother never has much of an answer for that So Grandma teaches Shelly about ghosts how to keep them and how to get rid of them not just her own ghosts but other people’s too Shelly likes to think of herself as her grandma’s apprentice Today Grandma’s client is a woman clad in expensive
yoga pants with her hair in a high ponytail We burned sage the woman says She tours Shelly and Grandma around her haunted apartment it’s bright and airy much bigger than the old duplex Shelly and her mom and grandma share To cleanse it you know Grandma smiles all bland and pointed and Shelly stifles a laugh with her hand at the image of this yoga lady waving her spice rack around trying to exorcise her apartment To cleanse it From the spirits The demons You know The woman gestures vaguely at Grandma at her soft brown skin and warm brown eyes at the little turtle earrings she wears every day The things that make some people say Native but Grandma corrects them and says Ililiw or Cree It’s cleansing The smoke We fanned it around the whole house and nothing The spirits are still here Shelly can see the ghost that haunts the lady’s apartment dancing around her feet It’s a little dog with a constantly wagging tail trotting around on tiny paws with nails that clack against the hardwood floors and echo through the hallways It noses its way over to Shelly and Grandma like it wants to play ALLISON MILLS
Grandma keeps smiling her eyes on the woman and not the ghost dog I don’t use sage to cleanse ghosts Oh So it’s like for other stuff Bad juju Grandma turns her back on the woman This is a tough case she says and winks at Shelly I might have to charge a little more for the work Do you mind Grandma heads deeper into the apartment listening to the woman talk seriously about the sound of claws scraping scraping over the floors and the cold wind that blows around her ankles whenever she comes home about how she feels like the spirits want her gone and isn’t it weird that her brand new condo is haunted like this Shelly takes a seat in the hallway and clucks her tongue at the dog smiling She’s never had a pet before too expensive but she likes dogs A ghost dog would be a good pet ghosts don’t need feeding the same way living beings do It’s okay she tells the dog leaning toward it so Grandma’s client won’t hear her whispering She tugs the tie off the end of the braid Grandma wove her long dark hair into and combs her fingers through it loosening it Grandma and I are going to take you for a walk The dog’s tail wags even harder and Shelly lets it dance THE GHOST COLLECTOR
