boards Splat He fell right onto the sidewalk Are you okay Malcolm asked Dandy didn’t answer He just pointed back at his foot jammed tight in the steps Malcolm reached over and grabbed Dandy’s ankle He braced himself and pulled and tugged and yanked and whoop Dandy’s foot popped free But just his foot His sneaker was still stuck in the steps Dandy are you okay Malcolm asked again rolling his friend over Malcolm expected to see scrapes and scratches and a bloody nose But all he saw was jacket He unzipped it enough to uncover Dandy’s face
Dandy grinned This is why turtles never get bopped on the noggin He zipped the jacket back up burying his head Mail Carrier Nancy strolled up the sidewalk Here’s your mail She handed Malcolm a tall stack of envelopes of every shape and size Thanks he said grabbing the stack Dandy was sitting back on the steps playing tug-of-war with his sneaker Did it come Malcolm shuffled through the stack There was a bright pink envelope for Cocoa It smelled like the girly stores at the mall Gag There were four envelopes for Grandma Eunice Three were addressed to Senior
Citizen and one was a sample box of laxatives Malcolm’s mom got an envelope full of super-saver coupons and an invitation to a bridal shower Malcolm always wondered why the bride couldn’t just take a bath like everyone else And there was an electric bill addressed to his dad Poor Dad All he ever got was bills Malcolm thumbed through each one trying not to spill them on the ground And just as he’d hoped his envelope was on the bottom It was crinkly and brown and sealed tight Yes He was ready to rush in and open it but Dandy was now swaying back and forth He was dancing with that sneaker It’s crammed in tight he told Malcolm
